Q - Why do women have smaller feet than men?
A - So they can stand closer to the kitchen sink!

Q - The dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door... which do you let in first?
A - The dog of course, at least he'll shut up once he's inside!

Q - What do you call a woman with 2 brain cells?
A - Pregnant

Q - What do you call a woman that has lost 95% of her intelligence?
A - Divorced

"I believe most American women are either consciously or unconsciously in cahoots with the devil." -AWS

Top Ten Reasons Why American Women Suck

1) Selfish - to the point where they don't know the difference between love of self and plain downright greed--and drilled into believing that whatever happens is the fault of whatever man is in their life because of the feminist crud drilled into them by the cadre of asexual closet cases called "therapists" who appear on "Ricki", "Oprah" or other such electronic drivel

2) Deluded - into thinking they "deserve" a rich, model-handsome husband who will "take them away from all of this"--whatever the "this" might be--and leading to resentment when they discover that the universe does NOT revolve around them

3) Angry - ALL the damn time about things which are so far out of their control as to be nonsensical--and constantly wanting to "discuss" this mind numbing drivel ad nauseam

4) Psychotic - multiple personalities in the same woman - as "Nomad" put it in the "Star Trek" episode: "Woman...a mass of inconsistencies...", and also when the feminist voices in their heads start with the regrets and victim acculturation

5) Worthless - anything that does not immediately resolve itself in her favor or to her benefit is meaningless to her, especially husband and family


6) Lazy - drilled into their head that they "deserve" a maid, nanny and personal slave to take care of every detail - and that their husband/boyfriend is REQUIRED to cater to their each and every mindless whim

7) Resentful - especially of other women who have things that they do not, in material, spiritual and esoteric senses

8) Greedy - to them, "housekeeping" means getting the house in the divorce (thanks to Zsa Zsa for that immortal line) and sucking the guy for every last cent, even if they had nothing to do with the building of the nest egg

9) Mindless - constant, irritating, idle prattle about topics they read about in some women's magazine and then become instant experts--particularly pop psychology and the latest crap they see on "Oprah" or "Ricki"

10) Vain - believing that they are irresistible to everything in pants and therefore are allowed to behave sluttish and without any honor.